Aku Tak Mau Sendiri

Sejak ia pergi dari hidupku
Ku merasa sepi
Dia tinggalkan ku sendiri disini
Tanpa satu yang pasti

Aku tak tahu harus bagaimana
Aku merasa tiada berkawan
Selain diriMU
Selain cintaMU

Chorus:
Kirim aku malaikatMU
Biar jadi kawan hidupku
Dan tunjukkan jalan yang memang
KAU pilihkan untukku
Kirim aku malaikatMU
Karena ku sepi berada disini
Dan didunia ini aku tak mau sendiri

Tanpa terasa kuteteskan air mata ini
Yang tiada berhenti mengiringi
Kisah dihati

Aku tak tahu harus bagaimana
Aku merasa tiada berkawan
Selain dirimu
Selain cintamu

Chorus 2x

Jude, this one i dunno how to translate yet, title means “I don’t want to be alone”

 

Dedicated to my big jie, JUDE, because she is a ”chin-chong” (i.e. Chinese) person who dun understand written Malay *ROFL* We only teach each other how to curse in our different languages but not exactly the language itself…hahaha….wat the heck right? At least we will know when ppl curse us in a different language

Here goes…..

Aku merasa ada yang hilang
(I felt something is missing)

Tanpa tahu apa yang sudah aku temukan
(Without knowing what I have found)

Aku merasa menemukan
(I felt I’ve found)

Tanpa tahu apa yang aku cari
(Without knowing what I was looking for)

Dan aku seperti masih mencari
(And it is as though I’m still searching)

Tanpa tahu apa yang sudah hilang
(Without knowing what I have lost)

Another one…..

Seseorang yang kita fikir adalah milik kita
(Someone whom we thought belongs to us)

Ternyata bukan benar-benar milik kita
(In reality isn’t really ours)

Kita memiliki hatinya, tubuhnya, dan cintanya,
(We may have their heart, their body and their love)

Tapi kita tidak akan pernah memiliki jalan hidupnya
(But we will never have their destiny)

 

Aku merasa ada yang hilang
Tanpa tahu apa yang sudah aku temukan
Aku merasa menemukan
Tanpa tahu apa yang aku cari
Dan aku seperti masih mencari
Tanpa tahu apa yang sudah hilang

Seseorang yang kita fikir adalah milik kita
Ternyata bukan benar-benar milik kita
Kita memiliki hatinya, tubuhnya, dan cintanya,
Tapi kita tidak akan pernah memiliki jalan hidupnya…

 

Restless, Sleepless

Slept early but its doesn’t help when the mind is not at peace. So sub-consciously i’m sort of awake I guess. Then I had some freaky nightmare again, which woke me up at 12midnite. Mum happened to check on me and I just mumbled that I had nightmare. Then tried going back to sleep.

Woke up again at 3am. Then again at 4am, awaken by the phone. Then eventually up and about at 5am to really do sahur. Just me & sis.

Did my subuh,  shower and back in bed trying to steal some sleep yet. But just couldn’t. I think I clocked a good 20min before I sprung out of bed thinking I was late for work, it was only 6:45am. So I drop the entire idea for good - and just get ready for work.

Weeelleeeelll…now I’m suffering the consequences of having that sleepless nights. I can’t focus right now. So I tot ranting would just perk me up a lil’ bit. I’m so going to take my usual nap later on slight earlier than usual.

Abt an hour more before that could happen and all this production roll-out is making my eyes roll too. How can they hold the projects and roll them out all at the same time….i’ll go crazy ensuring their my jobs run smoothly. I forsee next week is going to be hell. This week is pre-implementation only..next week the real thing….

I hope tomorrow’s iftar with the big family will be fun….Insya Allah….

I.M.U

 

Which part of “I don’t want” that you don’t understand, huh??!!!??? *sigh*

Saja-saja tak nampak ke? Tak nak tengok ke? BUTA ke?

Atau, bengang sangat sampai tak paham bahasa ni?

Seriously, bukak mata bleh tak….tak susah sey…just need to bukak mata and tengok je…..Seeing is Believing kan…so, tak paham lagi ke?

 

Ramadhan Al-Mubarak

Ramadhan Al-Mubarak to all my Muslim Brothers and Sisters wherever in the world you may be.  May you be blessed this holy month of Ramadhan….

Insya Allah…

My pledge for Ramadhan 1430H/2009

1. I must do my best to perform my Solat Fardhu 5 times a day without slacking, from this Ramadhan onwards. (I had been slacking at times, have to admit lorr)
2. I must do my best to achieve at least 5 nights of terawih (being realistic here ok, I could do more if time permits). I didn’t get even one last year, which is BAD.
3. Do more charity, which comes in many form, not just by dropping money in the box eh.

I am being realistic as to the above pledges. Dengan izinNya, Insya Allah…

This is my attempt at GOAL SETTING….so its best to start with spiritual first, at least that’s how I’m approaching it.

THEN, we move on to the worldly things, which we NEED in order to live in this expensive world, bearing in mind not to do it at the expense of others. So here goes, Dee is on a new mission to earn it…

But for tonight, its dinner with my two “Ta-Jie”…

 

I know exactly what I want, and what I will do if I get it. If I do, the rest of it will fall into place nicely. But I just can’t get it, that one wish just doesn’t happen, and I just couldn’t function without it…. how ah? how ah?

If getting old means becoming lazy, i don’t want to grow old. Can?

I don’t seem to have the same energy I did like those years in poly days…..is it genuinely lazy or just that life is not as fun and interesting as it used to be?

How to make it more fun and interesting?

This backpain is making me suffer. Damn it!

And yes! I went to ION Orchard Burger King, smallest BK i ever dined in. No further comment. having to face the wall while eating sure feels odd. It made me turned back couple of times for no apparent reason. Attempt to take photo also failed….hahaha….we made much noise bothering our neighbour who is busy studying Sorry gal! hahaha…

Now I’m just bored and sick of doing timesheet…really wasting time. How weird is that? Timesheet = Time Waste….if the timelog system is much more better..probably it would help. I don’t know how ppl here works lah..i give up trying to understand…i just do my work can already lor….

5pm – timechecked. I need a walk before I do my a-pp-rai-sal

 

If everyone is fighting for a piece of me, do I have to fight back to get the whole piece of me back in one big piece.  WTH am I talking about????

Or should I just let them have me? the usuals that is….as what they all have been doing now.

I’m not exactly saying there is that many fighting for me….But I’m beginning to feel like somewhat a resource that is being used, or should I say ABUSED. Af first it was voluntary, but now I’m beginning to feel OVERLY-USED & ABUSED.

I know I shouldn’t bitched about it but change the matter at hand. But then again, I tend to see the positive side of things and hope that it turn towards the imaginary positive idea I had. But most of the time, I have to say, I’m wrong. I just getter deeper into the shit-hole than I ever was.

But if I’m filthy rich, I probably don’t need to bow to such demands. Right? But instead someone else could possibly bowing to me who can be the difficult arses who make life miserable for others. So what is this all about? MONEY? Which end of the scale would one rather be stuck at? The losing end or otherwise?

What else revolves around our life generally besides MONEY? LOVE?

I think that’s about the 2 most important things that make the world goes round and round and round each and every second.

But its hard to find one who is happy to have too much of either. Some have neither. Some are have one but not the other.

But how do you find balance between both, and be contented with that balance. I’d probably be happy with it. Probably? See, there is no end to it. Still i’m not certain if that will make me happy.  Difficult indeed. *sigh*

Right now, i’m at this stage of - Not getting what I want, Not wanting what I get. And it sucks!

 

I’m so bloody sick of the one-way traffic. Really, why?
FCKN Sickening….! Seriously need to FCK OFF!

 

I need my 3rd cuppa coffee before I can read the eScrow Agreement crap again…this is really a pain siah…..