A Broken Puzzle

I’ve made up my mind. Time to do what I need to do. Period.

The offer is right there. Its like an exit sign showing me the way out. But I kept standing in the burning building thinking someone is gonna save me. I guess this time it is time to make the decision. Should I take it up or not? Offer wasn’t that great. Barely a hike. But then again, I’m not wanting to burn bridges for that matter. So I need a polite, diplomatic way to reject. But the thoughts of going through shit everyday just made me want to believe the grass is greener on the east side.

Why is growing up so difficult? I just wanna make a simple living. Probably living a country life would be simpler, OR NOT! Either I’m stressed out over serious decision making or I’m just stressed out over a lot of things.

The key is to prioritize. That much I kept telling myself. So what’s most important in life? Life itself. For if there is no life, there is not point in doing other things. It is one or the other. So to live, is to stay healthy. And I’m finally gonna go for that dreaded ultrasound. Hate to find out all these complicated biological mystery of being a woman. But I’ve made some calls to have it scheduled at the soonest possible slot. *fingers crossed – no surgery or such, please*  Then there’s the job I need to seriously consider. Then Grandpa’s final stage renal failure, he’s really looking frail. And then there is my life. What am I to do with this life of mine? I’m just tired, so very tired. I’m welcoming the 2 weeks break. I hope I put it to good use.

Probably a new resolution is to start picking up those goals I set for myself which I have completely forgotten somehow. Awal Muharram is coming in couple of days. The start of the new Islamic year. Maybe should start now….

Till next posting…